"Well, I cheated a bit," Jedao admits after a few moments. It makes a little rill of fear skitter up his ribs, but Neal has already seen his blood, so there's no point in pretending to be human. And it's something Jedao can give him, right now.
"That's one of the big security holes in the cabin system, that doors don't count as inside themselves for the cabin thresholds. You can kick in a door with super strength, or. If you're...telekinetic." Not a word native to his own situation, but Eiffel has called him an Exman enough for him to pick up the lingo. "You can just nudge the lock mechanism from the inside."
So. That's how.
"After - after the worst shit of my life. I was a political prisoner for two years. Gentle house arrest with lots of side interrogation, sort of thing. I was more restricted than here, but - all of the violence and chaos, there wasn't any of that. I knew what each day was going to be like, and...I could just breathe, for a while. I didn't have to make any giant decisions or deal with constant crisis or look after someone and put their issues before mine. I could just water my little onion plant and go to art therapy and play stupid video games and grade papers and then go to sleep. And when I started to scheme about maybe escaping, there was no deadline, no pressure. I could just figure things out at my own pace. It was maybe the kindest thing anyone had ever done for me."
Shuos-zho would hate being called kind out loud, but he doesn't have to know.
"I would have been a complete fucking mess of a warden if I hadn't got that time, which I know because one of those age floods took it away from me for awhile." And he'd been fucking deranged about almost everyone he met, way worse than Neal is.
"I want...that kind of time for you, to figure out who you want to be. The space to breathe instead of always getting hit with the next thing. I don't really believe in deserving as a good metric, most of the time. But I think you deserve that."
no subject
"That's one of the big security holes in the cabin system, that doors don't count as inside themselves for the cabin thresholds. You can kick in a door with super strength, or. If you're...telekinetic." Not a word native to his own situation, but Eiffel has called him an Exman enough for him to pick up the lingo. "You can just nudge the lock mechanism from the inside."
So. That's how.
"After - after the worst shit of my life. I was a political prisoner for two years. Gentle house arrest with lots of side interrogation, sort of thing. I was more restricted than here, but - all of the violence and chaos, there wasn't any of that. I knew what each day was going to be like, and...I could just breathe, for a while. I didn't have to make any giant decisions or deal with constant crisis or look after someone and put their issues before mine. I could just water my little onion plant and go to art therapy and play stupid video games and grade papers and then go to sleep. And when I started to scheme about maybe escaping, there was no deadline, no pressure. I could just figure things out at my own pace. It was maybe the kindest thing anyone had ever done for me."
Shuos-zho would hate being called kind out loud, but he doesn't have to know.
"I would have been a complete fucking mess of a warden if I hadn't got that time, which I know because one of those age floods took it away from me for awhile." And he'd been fucking deranged about almost everyone he met, way worse than Neal is.
"I want...that kind of time for you, to figure out who you want to be. The space to breathe instead of always getting hit with the next thing. I don't really believe in deserving as a good metric, most of the time. But I think you deserve that."