For a long, long moment, Hakkai simply sinks into it, the seconds sliding by golden-sweet and viscous as honey. At last, a regrettable need for air forces him to break the kiss and rest his forehead against Jedao's.
"...You know," he murmurs. "I'm yours first and always, no matter what happens with him. I don't ever want you to be uncomfortable over my being jealous of the Barge's fourth hottest vampire."
"I'm not uncomfortable," Jedao promises, shoulders shifting as he huffs. "I'm just annoyed he's so - inconsistent, and it hurts you. I'd have tried seducing him ages ago if you hadn't wanted to be first, and now it's some guy. Rude."
Hakkai can reasonably say that he has no claim on Gojyo until he turns blue, but Jedao doesn't believe it. Gojyo does love him; it's just that he's not capable of admitting it, and he's hurting Hakkai again by it.
"Yes, well," Hakkai admits, "you're the only one who I told I wanted that. I certainly didn't tell him." Because he'd assumed Gojyo would've panicked and made it weird, because he'd valued their friendship over the potential of romance, because he'd been too much of a coward to risk being rejected for something that mattered again: he'd had a lot of reasons.
"I tried to flirt a little, but I'm not sure he noticed." He's very bad at flirting, and he's also not sure Gojyo wanted to notice. So.
... So.
"Anyway," he says at last, with another sigh that feels as though it comes all the way up from his toenails, "I want him as my friend more than I'm jealous he doesn't want me for anything else, and I'm only going to be a little unreasonable about it. I promise I won't pine. You won't mind if I'm clingy for a little while?"
To remind himself he is loved, by at least some of the people who he loves, even if it isn't all of them.
"Cling away. I'm going to feel smugly superior that I was smart enough to never let you go," Jedao promises, with another kiss.
"You want me to hold you down tonight?" he offers - clinging right back, grounding, overwhelming him, if Jedao can manage it, reassurance and distraction together.
"I can work on your shoulders while you finish your tea, or bed right now?" Jedao asks, nuzzling Hakkai's hair, voice warm and rich with his own patient, possessive hunger.
"Let me finish my tea first," Hakkai murmurs, reaching up to capture one of Jedao's hands and tugging it to his lips. He drops a kiss against Jedao's knuckles, then another on his fingertips. "I don't want to bring anything else to bed with you."
Certainly not his own frustrated roil of feelings about Gojyo's new boyfriend. A cup of tea, and he'll set those aside for later.
"I wouldn't mind, if you did," Jedao admits, shifting around to knead gently at his neck and shoulders. "Your feelings are a part of you, and I love all of you. I love that you're loyal, and possessive. I still love you when you're frustrated and bitter. If you can let it simmer away with the tea, I'll love being gentle and joyful with you. And if you can't, I'll love doing my absolute best to fuck it right out of you."
He drops a soft kiss on the back of Hakkai's neck.
"There is no way for you to come to me, wanting me, wrong."
Hakkai picks up his tea as Jedao turns him gently around, cradling it in his palms as Jedao's hands work over his shoulders. He doesn't drink; he's listening.
I love all of you, Jedao says, and Hakkai -- scarred, bitter, jealous, angry soul that he knows himself to be -- Hakkai believes him.
He closes his eyes as Jedao kisses the nape of his neck.
A moment later, he throws back the entire cup in one long draught, not caring that he's burned his mouth quite badly, and turns to catch Jedao up in a passionate kiss that backs him against the nearest wall.
The only way Hakkai's feelings for Gojyo could be wrong, to Jedao, to feel with Jedao, would be if he wanted Gojyo with him instead of Jedao. And although it's taken him a little while to be absolutely certain that's not the case, it doesn't even cross his mind now.
He kisses back hard and fierce, and even though he's the one caged against the wall, presses on Hakkai's back with a mothpush to keep holding them close, a vertiginous moment where it feels like Hakkai has him pinned down on the ground instead of upright.
Down tips towards Jedao, and Hakkai doesn't even try to stop himself from falling into his gravity, their bodies heavy against the wall as it becomes the floor. Hakkai's teeth scrape Jedao's lip; he kisses like he's starving, like he could drink Jedao down as deeply as his scalding tea.
He does love Gojyo; he's known it for a long time, even if they've never said it clearly to each other, even if he isn't sure what Gojyo wants from him. But he loves Jedao too -- he feels safe with Jedao, safe stripped bare before him, down past the skin.
He breaks the kiss with a ragged gasp for breath, pushing himself away from the wall with one hand as he reaches up with the other to swipe his limiters free of his ear, reaches out to the edge of the counter to drop them there where gravity swings back to point at the floor again.
For this, he wants to be really naked.
"Let's go to bed," he says softly, his longer hair curling in a messy mop around his jawline as he leans back down to mouth a kiss against Jedao's pulse.
Jedao groans, tipping his head back, offering his throat for Hakkai's teeth, his hands coming up to stroke through the curls.
"With my beautiful husband," Jedao murmurs, dropping the push against the wall and taking Hakkai's hands to tug him into the bedroom, the earrings unobtrusively floating a few feet behind them, so that they'll be on the bedside table whenever Hakkai wants them again.
Hakkai nips at Jedao's throat when he offers it, lightly enough that even his sharper fangs won't break skin, and lets Jedao tug him along. The glint of silver midair behind them catches his eye, and he hides a smile in another kiss as they reach the bed, not commenting.
"I'm the one with a beautiful husband," he counters, deliberately silly, and kicks his shoes away before he reaches clumsily for his shirt buttons. He's still no good at navigating them with claws.
Hakkai shivers, leaving his buttons alone and dropping his hands to rest on Jedao's thighs instead. Goosebumps prickle under the caress of Jedao's fingertips and his pupil is blown so wide as to almost drown the yellow of his one real eye.
"Whatever you want," he breathes, and slips his hands up a little further, getting a shameless double-handful of his husband's ass.
Jedao squeaks, then laughs, undoing another button and ducking his head to lick the notch of Hakkai's clavicle, nuzzle the next few inches of revealed skin.
"I want to take you apart," he promises, voice low and warm and husky, sweet and dark as molasses. "Slowly."
"I want to let you," Hakkai confesses to him, his head falling back to bare throat and chest to Jedao's attention. His grip goes gentle, claw-tips trailing up over the small of Jedao's back.
"Because I am yours." It's a touchstone he keeps, no matter what else either of them might feel, or who for: he's Jedao's to his marrow, and Jedao is his. Knowing that, it's not so hard to set other things aside.
Jedao slides his hand under Hakkai's half-open shirt to grip his shoulder in a way that makes his wedding ring press, heavy and warm from his skin, right into the spot where Hakkai's shoulder muscles tend to start knotting up.
The smooth metal pressing hard into tight muscle hurts, with a deep ache for a long moment before the tightness eases all at once. Hakkai's head falls back with a deep, hungry gasp and his fingers flex, claws scoring Jedao's back with pinprick scratches.
"Yes," he agrees, breathless and hungry with surrender, "--please--"
Jedao's breath hisses and shudders under the catch of Hakkai's claws. He pops the next button one-handed and presses a messy, open-mouthed kiss against Hakkai's throat, scraping with his teeth before sucking hard, his other hand still firm on Hakkai's shoulder.
Hakkai's head tips back a little further, baring the whole line of his throat to Jedao's teeth, before -- throat vibrating against the sharp sweet sting of suction -- he murmurs, "If you don't hurry up and get my clothes off I will have to take my chances with my claws."
There's a laugh in the words, bright with affection, but oh, he wants skin on skin now.
Jedao laughs back, loud and bright, and shoves Hakkai down with a hard mothpush, deeper into the bed than the mattress usually allows under their normal weight, heavy enough to make him dizzy for a moment, if he had his limiters on.
"So much for letting me go slowly," he teases, pulling apart the rest of Hakkai's buttons, dragging his spread hands down Hakkai's chest and then nuzzling his skin as he starts to work on Hakkai's pants.
"You can go slowly after we're naked," Hakkai replies, barely covering over the laughter in his voice with a falsely lordly tone. A shiver catches him as his shirt falls open and the skin against Jedao's lips prickles with goosebumps.
He sighs out a breath, pleased, his hands slipping up to curl possessively around Jedao's shoulders. His claws barely tickle the skin -- careful, no matter how much he wants to cling tight.
He has a few half-healed cuts there, from Florian graciously taking a knife to him to help him unwind after Sebastian, and Jedao shivers deliciously, grinds his dick against Hakkai's thigh, softly little noises escaping him. "Ah - ah -"
Fire and ash, the faint catch of Hakkai's claws is so good, an impossible tease, and Jedao has to gulp down several breaths and get his head back in the game so that he can start yanking Hakkai's pants off in earnest.
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"...You know," he murmurs. "I'm yours first and always, no matter what happens with him. I don't ever want you to be uncomfortable over my being jealous of the Barge's fourth hottest vampire."
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Hakkai can reasonably say that he has no claim on Gojyo until he turns blue, but Jedao doesn't believe it. Gojyo does love him; it's just that he's not capable of admitting it, and he's hurting Hakkai again by it.
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"I tried to flirt a little, but I'm not sure he noticed." He's very bad at flirting, and he's also not sure Gojyo wanted to notice. So.
... So.
"Anyway," he says at last, with another sigh that feels as though it comes all the way up from his toenails, "I want him as my friend more than I'm jealous he doesn't want me for anything else, and I'm only going to be a little unreasonable about it. I promise I won't pine. You won't mind if I'm clingy for a little while?"
To remind himself he is loved, by at least some of the people who he loves, even if it isn't all of them.
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"You want me to hold you down tonight?" he offers - clinging right back, grounding, overwhelming him, if Jedao can manage it, reassurance and distraction together.
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"Yes," he whispers, and curls closer, ashamed of his weakness and grateful for Jedao's perception all at the same time. "I would like that."
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Certainly not his own frustrated roil of feelings about Gojyo's new boyfriend. A cup of tea, and he'll set those aside for later.
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He drops a soft kiss on the back of Hakkai's neck.
"There is no way for you to come to me, wanting me, wrong."
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I love all of you, Jedao says, and Hakkai -- scarred, bitter, jealous, angry soul that he knows himself to be -- Hakkai believes him.
He closes his eyes as Jedao kisses the nape of his neck.
A moment later, he throws back the entire cup in one long draught, not caring that he's burned his mouth quite badly, and turns to catch Jedao up in a passionate kiss that backs him against the nearest wall.
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He kisses back hard and fierce, and even though he's the one caged against the wall, presses on Hakkai's back with a mothpush to keep holding them close, a vertiginous moment where it feels like Hakkai has him pinned down on the ground instead of upright.
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He does love Gojyo; he's known it for a long time, even if they've never said it clearly to each other, even if he isn't sure what Gojyo wants from him. But he loves Jedao too -- he feels safe with Jedao, safe stripped bare before him, down past the skin.
He breaks the kiss with a ragged gasp for breath, pushing himself away from the wall with one hand as he reaches up with the other to swipe his limiters free of his ear, reaches out to the edge of the counter to drop them there where gravity swings back to point at the floor again.
For this, he wants to be really naked.
"Let's go to bed," he says softly, his longer hair curling in a messy mop around his jawline as he leans back down to mouth a kiss against Jedao's pulse.
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"With my beautiful husband," Jedao murmurs, dropping the push against the wall and taking Hakkai's hands to tug him into the bedroom, the earrings unobtrusively floating a few feet behind them, so that they'll be on the bedside table whenever Hakkai wants them again.
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"I'm the one with a beautiful husband," he counters, deliberately silly, and kicks his shoes away before he reaches clumsily for his shirt buttons. He's still no good at navigating them with claws.
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"Let me, darling," he croons, opening a single button and stroking the triangle of collarbone revealed with soft fingertips.
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"Whatever you want," he breathes, and slips his hands up a little further, getting a shameless double-handful of his husband's ass.
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"I want to take you apart," he promises, voice low and warm and husky, sweet and dark as molasses. "Slowly."
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"Because I am yours." It's a touchstone he keeps, no matter what else either of them might feel, or who for: he's Jedao's to his marrow, and Jedao is his. Knowing that, it's not so hard to set other things aside.
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"Mine," he growls, vividly, viciously pleased.
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"Yes," he agrees, breathless and hungry with surrender, "--please--"
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There's a laugh in the words, bright with affection, but oh, he wants skin on skin now.
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"So much for letting me go slowly," he teases, pulling apart the rest of Hakkai's buttons, dragging his spread hands down Hakkai's chest and then nuzzling his skin as he starts to work on Hakkai's pants.
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He sighs out a breath, pleased, his hands slipping up to curl possessively around Jedao's shoulders. His claws barely tickle the skin -- careful, no matter how much he wants to cling tight.
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Fire and ash, the faint catch of Hakkai's claws is so good, an impossible tease, and Jedao has to gulp down several breaths and get his head back in the game so that he can start yanking Hakkai's pants off in earnest.
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