TLV IC Inbox

[deuceoftears]

Comments

[conning]

I'm pretty sure you loved him before I even knew him. What kind of brother would I be if I didn't make sure a person like that was there?

[deuceoftears]

I don't know much about brothers. But it has to be okay to...let someone be considerate of you.

[conning]

[There's a startled pause on Neal's end. He'd been trying in his own way to lighten things up a little, but--]

That's not a sentiment I'm particularly used to.

Thank you, though. I mean it.

[deuceoftears]

The answer to your actual question is, 'someone willing to sacrifice a little fairness for harmony,' which, okay, now that I say it out loud -

[He does laugh, now, ruefully.]

I think it's okay to want harmony at a party.

[He still needs to make sure Edwin will be okay with Arthur being at the Engagement party, and at least warn him about Yunlan, and make sure they're not sat next to each other -]

I'm glad I'll get to come, though. I'm - very grateful, that you reached out.

[He can tell how much courage it took, although he's not sure he should say so.]

[conning]

[Soft amusement.]

Thanks. It's-- Ironically, it's one of the ways I know this place has helped me. Because like hell I would have before I came here.

[deuceoftears]

A little while ago, you said you didn't always know why you reacted to things in certain ways. To me, that sounds like echo damage.

[Which is an official term, in Jedao's world - their version of PTSD.]

Is that something you want to figure out?

[Because if not Jedao will drop it forever.]

[conning]

[Theres a long delay while he emotionally recoils, cycles through a half-dozen needle and nails replies that could blow this up and save him more personal risk.

He finally manages to say something that isn't one of those things, and is far more weary than defensive.]

I'm not sure I want to know I'm unfixable.

[deuceoftears]

[Soft and pragmatic,]

Well, good news there. I'm almost certain Earth doesn't have psych surgery, so that means any unusual responses are just things you've learned with the parts of you that don't talk. And you're not dead, which means you can unlearn them, or at least lessen their power to ruin your day.

You don't even need to actually trust anyone to work on it, although I've heard it theoretically helps. I didn't trust my psych team any farther than I could kick them, but I still picked up some useful techniques.

Anyway. I figured I should mention that's...possible. I know it's hard to believe from the inside.

But also not really my business. So.

[conning]

[Neal makes a small, mirthless noise.]

I don't trust anyone, so I suppose it's good that's not a requirement.

[He clears his throat.]

Anyway, I... There are some logistical things I need to sort out still, but I'll talk to Zerxus again and maybe we can try a mediated session as a post-holiday experiment.

[deuceoftears]

Is there anything else I should do before then, or would I just be in your way?