Eiffel grins perhaps a bit too eagerly when it's his turn to pat the snail, trying to make sure he avoids its noodly eye stalks and giving an excited little giggle despite himself.
"I know this is probably like super normal to some people but it's still weird," he says brightly, still watching the snail toddle along as he stands down again.
"It's neat. They're so - I don't know. Different from anything."
He doesn't say different from cats, because that sounds very dumb and obvious in his head. But for a long time, Zehun's cats were the only live animals he'd ever encountered.
"We've sorta got snails back on Earth like that," he says as they keep moving, "But they're not normally that big. Or that metal. Normally you'd see them in places that are all plant-y, like the greenhouse." He swings his torch as he talks. "Only I don't think you'd want normal ones in the greenhouse, they'd try and eat all the plants. Really, really slowly."
"Mmm, slug. Delicious," Jedao murmurs, which is even sillier from a guy that Eiffel has never observed eating with anything other that stoic, mechanical speed.
Honestly he's just glad someone hates the concept as much as him.
"And other bugs too! There are some places that do, like, deep fried crickets and grubs and there's this one stinking ass cheese that's got maggots in it?"
He pauses and glances away, as his voice echoes down the cave into silence. "Or wait, maybe that one's mold."
"Ohohooo, my poor dietarily challenged friend. Cheese is the stuff of gods." He counts his fingers out with flicks of his wrist as he counts off the ways. "You can grill it in a sandwich, deep fry it in batter, melt it so you can dip other food into it! It's got infinite possibilities!"
"I'm not gonna make you eat any of it," he comments dryly. Takes a moment to kick a large rock from underfoot and watch it roll down the gentle slope of their path. "But in my opinion? I reckon a good enough bowl of mac and cheese with the works is better than sex."
He's aware that humans enjoy human food. He vaguely remembers expecting food to be pleasant, before finding out that it isn't. But he's had mac and cheese, easy-to-prep barge staple that it is, and a theoretically easy-to-consume bomb of calories and dairy protein that would fulfill all his promises to Hemiola about getting enough to eat every day.
"Oh, yeah, I've had his cookies before," he comments cheerfully. "Don't think I've had a proper dinner from him yet, though. Or not in a while, for sure."
"We'll make it happen. There's another bigger chamber coming up -"
Their path has intersected with the underground river again, or maybe there's more than one. A waterfall descends from the middle of the high ceiling, and crystals the size of children line the water's edge.
Eiffel's about to make a smart comment, but then he sees the room and he's stunned into silence.
"...holy crap..."
It's beautiful, genuinely, in a way Eiffel doesn't really have the elitist background to be able to truly analyse, but he appreciates it in the depths of his shrivelled soul.
He moves towards the waterfall, careful to look down so he doesn't slip near the water, until he can stand by one of the crystals with one hand on it and his torch slack in the other; when he shifts his grip, it twists his wrist in a way where the light refracts through the crystal, sending rainbow lights sparkling through the spray of the waterfall.
Jedao makes a sound that might be called a squeak of delight.
"Eiffel! Do it again!" Jedao skitters over to the edge himself, carefully leaning over some of the less-razor-sharp crystals to get a look at the equally clear water beyond them. Like the main cavern, it has intricate lace-like glass diatoms floating in a delicate surface layer, drifting with the current, in this case revealing a spiral flow around the bottom of the waterfall, with tiny opalescent fish darting in between.
He saw it too, and the way he jumps slightly in surprise makes the light flick away from the crystals, but he can put two and two together as he beams.
"Yeah yeah yeah, hold on-!" He finds a good position to stand him and brace himself, and presses the torch deliberately against the flat part of a crystal.
And it's not just through the one: his torch refracts through the connecting crystals too, on all sorts of angles, and the way the refractions shoot out makes it look like they're in a glittering starscape, even in the shallow parts of the water pooling below the falls. And Arthur gives a breathless little laugh of delight.
Eiffel just beams, bright and genuine in a way that rarely comes through. In a way that isn't, for five minutes, touched by the deep exhaustion that dwells in his core.
"Never," he breathes, emphatically. "This is incredible."
"I feel like I could watch this for ages," Jedao whispers, shining his own light for the first time, skating across the gently turning face of a giant diatom, fluorescing a soft kaleidoscopic blue.
"One of those once in a lifetime opportunities people always go on about," he mumbles. He glances down at his torch, and twists it gently, turning it in his hand while it's pressed against the crystal, and watches the lights shift in halting patterns in time with his wrist. "Nice that I can cross spelunking off my bucket list."
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"I know this is probably like super normal to some people but it's still weird," he says brightly, still watching the snail toddle along as he stands down again.
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He doesn't say different from cats, because that sounds very dumb and obvious in his head. But for a long time, Zehun's cats were the only live animals he'd ever encountered.
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"I like that it wasn't scared of us. Just...kept on scooching."
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"Christ. You know people actually eat those, right? Like snails and things. On purpose!"
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"I don't know why I'm surprised."
CW bug food
"And other bugs too! There are some places that do, like, deep fried crickets and grubs and there's this one stinking ass cheese that's got maggots in it?"
He pauses and glances away, as his voice echoes down the cave into silence. "Or wait, maybe that one's mold."
Re: CW bug food
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"Ohohooo, my poor dietarily challenged friend. Cheese is the stuff of gods." He counts his fingers out with flicks of his wrist as he counts off the ways. "You can grill it in a sandwich, deep fry it in batter, melt it so you can dip other food into it! It's got infinite possibilities!"
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"...great," he manages, unconvincingly.
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"I'm not gonna make you eat any of it," he comments dryly. Takes a moment to kick a large rock from underfoot and watch it roll down the gentle slope of their path. "But in my opinion? I reckon a good enough bowl of mac and cheese with the works is better than sex."
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Like slugs, Eiffel!
He's aware that humans enjoy human food. He vaguely remembers expecting food to be pleasant, before finding out that it isn't. But he's had mac and cheese, easy-to-prep barge staple that it is, and a theoretically easy-to-consume bomb of calories and dairy protein that would fulfill all his promises to Hemiola about getting enough to eat every day.
"You are not having sex correctly."
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"You know, Gonou really likes cooking for people he cares about. We should get him to cook for you."
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Their path has intersected with the underground river again, or maybe there's more than one. A waterfall descends from the middle of the high ceiling, and crystals the size of children line the water's edge.
"...whoa..."
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"...holy crap..."
It's beautiful, genuinely, in a way Eiffel doesn't really have the elitist background to be able to truly analyse, but he appreciates it in the depths of his shrivelled soul.
He moves towards the waterfall, careful to look down so he doesn't slip near the water, until he can stand by one of the crystals with one hand on it and his torch slack in the other; when he shifts his grip, it twists his wrist in a way where the light refracts through the crystal, sending rainbow lights sparkling through the spray of the waterfall.
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"Eiffel! Do it again!" Jedao skitters over to the edge himself, carefully leaning over some of the less-razor-sharp crystals to get a look at the equally clear water beyond them. Like the main cavern, it has intricate lace-like glass diatoms floating in a delicate surface layer, drifting with the current, in this case revealing a spiral flow around the bottom of the waterfall, with tiny opalescent fish darting in between.
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"Yeah yeah yeah, hold on-!" He finds a good position to stand him and brace himself, and presses the torch deliberately against the flat part of a crystal.
And it's not just through the one: his torch refracts through the connecting crystals too, on all sorts of angles, and the way the refractions shoot out makes it look like they're in a glittering starscape, even in the shallow parts of the water pooling below the falls. And Arthur gives a breathless little laugh of delight.
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For a few seconds Jedao just...takes it in.
"Have you ever seen anything like it before?"
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"Never," he breathes, emphatically. "This is incredible."
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